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AUTISM & ADULTING ONLINE: CYBERBULLY EDITION

 


"Nearly half of US teens have experienced some form of cyberbullying. But it doesn't just impact our youth — 41% of adults and 95% of content creators have faced some type of online harassment" (Avast, 2024).  As communication and information spreads throughout the internet, so does hate and conflict.  No matter where you go, you will ALWAYS be victim to any kind of bullying.

Adding social struggles to the mix.  That can make it difficult.  I've had people I know recently fall victim to negativity in the media.  Unfortunately, you can't avoid negative comments...you just go around them like a road hazard.  You can, however, block the user, report the comment, or ignore the comment.  I've had many negative comments over the years.  I was cyberbullied before I got to my Disney World Internship in 2021.  It got to the point where I felt unsafe coming into work over one comment I made.  One of my friends had to call me to see if I was okay.  It was four years ago and I've learned to leave comment sections when you can't avoid the conflict.  You DO have the choice to engage.  Bullies online can't see your face.  They're more likely to bully you and say more harmful things.  Most, if not, all social media sites have ways and options you can block people.  

🧠 1. Know Your Boundaries

Autistic adults sometimes feel pressure to be overly polite or “people-please” online, which can make boundaries blurry.

Tips:

  • If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, you don’t owe them an explanation to block or unfollow.

  • Practice saying things like: “I’m not comfortable talking about this,” or simply stop responding.


🛠️ 2. Use Platform Tools

Most websites and apps have built-in features to help protect you.

What to do:

  • Block users who are unkind.

  • Report abusive content.

  • Mute or restrict comments/messages if needed.

  • Adjust privacy settings (e.g., make your account private or limit who can reply/comment).


🧩 3. Stick to Safe Online Communities

Find spaces where people are kind, respectful, and share your interests — especially communities run by and for neurodivergent folks.

Examples:

  • Autism forums with moderators

  • Facebook groups with clear community rules

  • Discord servers with good admin teams


🔍 4. Don’t Overshare Personal Info

Cyberbullies can sometimes use details you share to target you.

Protect yourself by:

  • Avoiding details like your address, phone number, or even your schedule.

  • Thinking twice before posting about emotional vulnerabilities in public spaces.


💬 5. Ask for Help from Trusted Allies

If you’re unsure if something is cyberbullying or you’re unsure how to respond:

  • Talk to a friend, therapist, coach, or trusted adult.

  • Save screenshots if needed — especially if it escalates.


💡 6. Learn to Spot Red Flags

Some people pretend to be supportive at first, then become mean or manipulative. Signs someone is not safe online:

  • They pressure you to talk when you’re not ready

  • They insult you, even “jokingly”

  • They keep messaging even when you ask for space


❤️ 7. Don’t Blame Yourself

Being bullied online is never your fault — whether you're autistic or not. Autistic people often face misunderstanding, but that doesn’t mean you should tolerate cruelty.


However, know this: you CAN avoid being cyberbullied and you CAN ignore people when they say mean things to you (online and in person). 

Know This:

  • Online bullying hurts. It's real—and you're not alone.

  • You do not owe a response. Protecting your well-being is more important than proving a point.

  • Support is out there—reach out and use the tools available.



🌟 How to Be Smart & Safe Online (Especially If You’re Autistic)

💻 1. Think Before You Share

  • Ask: “Would I be okay if a stranger saw this?”

  • Avoid posting personal info like:

    • Your full name and address

    • School or workplace

    • Phone number or daily routines


🧠 2. Use Your Strengths

  • Autistic people often notice patterns, details, or weird behavior online — this helps spot scams or fake accounts!

  • If something feels “off,” it probably is.


🛡️ 3. Privacy = Protection

  • Set your accounts to private or friends only

  • Limit who can comment or message you

  • Regularly check your privacy settings


🚫 4. Block, Mute, and Report

  • If someone is rude, creepy, or pushy:

    • Block them

    • Mute their messages

    • Report them to the app/platform

💡You don’t have to reply to mean people. Silence is powerful.


🤔 5. Be Cautious with Online Friends

  • It’s okay to make friends online — just go slow.

  • If someone wants to video chat, meet in person, or send gifts too fast, it’s a red flag.

  • Never send private photos or personal info, even if they seem nice.


🧩 6. Stick to Kind & Safe Spaces

  • Look for neurodivergent-friendly communities.

  • Join groups with clear rules and active moderators.

  • If a space makes you anxious or drained, it’s okay to leave.


🧍‍♀️ 7. Trust Your Gut

  • If something feels weird or confusing — trust your instincts.

  • Ask a trusted friend, therapist, or family member if you're unsure.


💬 8. Ask for Help When You Need It

  • Save messages or screenshots if someone is bothering you.

  • Don’t be afraid to ask for help — you deserve to feel safe and respected online.

If you or someone you know are being cyberbullied, this is a perfect time to speak up.  

You can’t always stop mean people from saying things online — but you can take steps to protect your energy and your peace.

You’re allowed to walk away.
You’re allowed to block.
You’re allowed to stay safe.

The following are some videos on cyberbullying + some infographics on cyberbullying.











LAST WORD/BONUS: You've scrolled all the way down! Watch a movie from the 2010s featuring some former Disney Channel actresses. The movie is called Cyberbully and it's about a girl who gets bullied by her friends.  WARNING: there is discussion on mental health and suicide, but honestly, this is what happens when someone is severely cyberbullied.


If you liked this blog post, PLEASE comment down below what your favorite part was, share with your friends and family, etc.  Have any comments, questions, etc. about what you were reading? Reach out to me by messaging me on instagram or TikTok @neurospicyblondie or email me  alyssa.onthespectrum@gmail.com.  



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