A Girl Living with AuDHD: A Journey

  Have you been in a situation where you felt uncomfortable to be in that a friend forced you to be in?  Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like you have no control whatsoever?  This is what it feels like to have your consent taken from you.  Consent is respecting people's boundaries in any kind of relationship. Consent is part of life as an adult.  (if you are underage (18 years old), you still have the right to say "no".) You don't have to be a certain age to not give consent.  Giving someone your consent is a way of respecting boundaries.  Unfortunately, we aren't always going to get our way in everything we do. However, a good and effective way we can advocate is by giving or not giving our consent to others.  Many times people think that it's a sexual thing, but it doesn't have to be.  If your mom and dad are telling you to get a job because you're an adult and you live there rent-free doing nothing all day...that's differe...

Have you ever been broken up with?  Friend-zoned? Turned down by a dream job?  How did it make you feel?  You probably experienced a form of loss of what could've been.  This is a normal human experience, right!?  Well, it depends on how you take it.  Oddly enough, there is a diagnosis called Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) , and this interferes with a person's ability to regulate their reaction and feelings to rejection and failure.  This is common in individuals with an ADHD and autism diagnosis.   For me, how RSD has manifested itself is the amount of times I've been turned down by guys that I've liked (don't worry, I've learned that if they don't like me back, it's for the best!) and jobs I've applied for.  I'm going to use the jobs example to share my experience on how rejection has impacted me.  I've only kept 3 jobs long-term in my life (this doesn't include being self-employed as a flute and piano lessons teacher)....

  Do you live in the Utah Valley area? Are you 18 or older?  Located in Orem, Utah on the north side of campus at Utah Valley University is the Melisa Nellesen Center for Autism, a two-story building that hosts the Masters in ABA program (a program for students to get certified to become a Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA)), the Autism Minor/Certification program (where students can do an internship to receive their certificate to become a Registered Behavioral Technician (RBT)), Wolverine's Elevated Program (a 3-year program for students with an intellectual or learning disability to receive one-on-one tutoring as well as a associates' degree equivalent leadership certification), and the Passages Program (which is what I am going to be discussing today).  The Passages Program is an adult-centered program for any adult over the age of 18 with an autism diagnosis (self-diagnoses may be accepted).  While the Autism Center at UVU has been around since 2017, the UV...

  How many times have you said something before you could stop yourself from saying it?  Unfortunately, this is a struggle that a lot of people with autism (and AuDHD) have. In the DSM-5TR, it lists the two domains in the autism diagnostic criteria: social communication challenges & restrictive repetitive behaviors and interests.  Today, I am going to discuss the social communication challenges that arise in autistic individuals and how people on the autism spectrum may struggle with thinking before they speak. The DSM-5-TR shares the following criteria on social communication challenges in autism: Deficits in using communication for social purposes, such as greeting and sharing information, in a manner that is appropriate for the social context. Impairment of the ability to change communication to match context or the needs of the listener, such as speaking differently in a classroom than on a playground, talking differently to a child than to an adult, and avoiding ...

  It's time to get real girls!  How many of us experience pre-menstrual syndrome (PMS) symptoms before our menstrual cycles?  (We LOVE that time of month as a girl...) Roughly 80% of us girlies will experience PMS! *sarcastic* Whoopie!  Now, my ADHD girlies...I'm talkin' to you!  Did you know that 45% of us deal with what is called Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) ?  (I'm one of them...) The image below compares PMS and PMDD: I'll say this, when experiencing PMDD, I never thought I would feel this way about myself and it hurts most cycles.  If you want a simple definition: PMDD is like PMS symptoms, but with the volume up to the highest notch.  Having ADHD, autism, AND PMDD is *SO* much fun *cries in PMDD depression*. PMDD is low serotonin with a high sensitivity to fluctuations in estrogen and progesterone and all of these hormonal changes occur during the luteal phase of a menstrual cycle.  Learning more about PMDD gave me a pat...

  "Your friends don't like you!" "You're too fat!" "I am embarrassing myself." "No one likes me."  All things we've told ourselves, right!?!  The thing is, with being neurodivergent, especially having autism (or AuDHD), you tend to fixate on negative thoughts for a while.  That's not healthy!  Mental health is hard enough on people and sometimes we just need to teach our brains, "thank you but I need to move on."  Sometimes, it can be hard to forget or let go of our negative thoughts.  This is where unhooking comes in. In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), we focus on our values and if we are experiencing a thought that is not within our towards area, we have to leave it alone and move away from it.  It's hard, but sometimes we have to let it go or we can't grow. In her book,  Self Care for Autistic People  (2024), Dr. Megan Anna Neff (p.124-125) talks about 8 ways we can unhook from painful thoughts: Thoug...